Capitalism; the Most Effective Life Support Communism Could Ever Want
This week, the Association nearly required…disciplining and reeducation by their Chinese overlords. Thankfully, Lebron James was there to…mess things up even more.
Now, before I get into the meat of my argument, but after I’ve tried to hook you in with a somewhat clever opening line, I’d like to preface things by stating that I believe in the good of capitalism. I am a small business owner. I’m also an employee of a family owned company. I’m happy in both my professional endeavors exchanging my time and services for an acceptable, maybe even decent wage.
But as a capitalist engaging in capitalistic exercises so I can build my stash of capital with which I intend to engage in continued adventures in capitalism, I have to admit that I’m helping to keep Chinese communism alive. Think about all the oppressive, imperialistic, cruel regimes that ever were: the Persian and Roman empires, the Vikings, the Mongols, dynastic China, Victorian England, fascist Germany, the Spanish Armada, the African slave trade, segregation and Jim Crow, warring amongst indigenous tribes in the Americas, Africa, and Australia. Even communist Russia. They are all outstripped in human rights violations by the Chinese totalitarian government. It’s not even a close race. If you are a liberal and want to take away all the abortions China has forced upon their population because you don’t believe unborn babies are humans even though Chinese women tend to abort unborn girls at a much higher rate than they do boys, they might be in the same league as the USSR. But that kind of proves my point, right? Communism and a anthropology don’t willingly dance in rhythm.
And that’s the dilemma for me. I like my iPhone. I like my GM car made with parts from China. I like my Nintendo and Super Nintendo classics. I like my—just about everything. But I’m horrified by the idea they are manufactured by companies owned, controlled, and operated by a government so desperately in need of power they will brook no criticism from an NBA executive, fairly and reasonably showing support for the set apart citizens of Hong Kong who don’t take freedom of speech and all that jazz as for granted as us.
The desire to dominate and enjoy authority over others is couched in the hearts of all men. I might say “mankind” but I really do men “men” in the gender sense. This fault isn’t as common in women. It’s a daily struggle for those who know and accept how wicked we humans are. When you want some good and also scary reading, Google some facts about life in China. Google things like bureaucrats overseeing their assigned batch of family units, making sure they are staying in line and not having any babies in secret. Look up the people who have been disappeared by the regime for having the gall to have an opinion or practice a religion. Search China’s blatant disrespect for intellectual property and how whenever anyone gets famous in the West, their name and brand are automatically copyrighted by communist capitalists so they can profit off said property without ever sharing a dime with the originator of the brand. Seriously, someone literally copyrighted “Michael Jordan” years ago and has been profiting since. Find out what the regime does in order to keep problematic Christian churches behaving. And then bone up on the history of the violent Communist takeover you learned in Social Studies class. Something about a square tank made of tea and some guy who wouldn’t yield the right of way comes to mind. When you’re done, get on your knees and profusely thank the living God you were born in the U.S.A.
You see, the NBA this week kind of disproved what they’ve been saying since 2016. Their executives and players have attacked Donald Trump for his perceived shortcomings. Outside of a ridiculous Twitter or campaign rally diatribe, he’s basically absorbed it and moved on with his life. The liberals in the public eye and many virtual friends on my Facebook feed call Trump a dictator and tyrant who will stop at nothing to maintain power. When he’s either voted out of office next November or term-limited out in five years, can we take something away from these folks? Maybe not whole internet but we can put them on Lexus Nexus for a farmer’s fortnight, which—on top of just having made up to sound cool—I doubt is any different than a regular fortnight, unless you want to get bakers in the mix, then concrete numbers in the general proximity of twelve have less meaning. Unless Trump is good at keeping secrets (he’s not), I doubt he’s planning a forced and violent takeover of the NBA. Don’t be looking for the Phoenix gorilla to be replaced by the Dunking Donalds anytime soon. Don’t take my Dunking Donalds idea, guys.
One can only imagine the emails and memos that have circulated since that dastardly tweet. I suspect they were long, cold treatises in a managerial tone that could have been condensed into “Come on, seriously you guys, SHUT. UP.” The NBA has oodles of money to make and criticizing China is biting the hand that feeds—and occasionally chastises. The potential money they can earn hasn’t yet been converted into kinetic money. So guys, be cool about it and keep your opinions in your head where they belong. If you want to throw all manner of pejoratives at the Don, be my and our guest. What’s he gonna do about it? Oh, we just proved this guy’s point again. RASPBERRIES!
So liberal organizations like the NBA and their ideological bedfellows must either stop acting so sanctimonious about capitalist and corporate bondage to the dollar, or come to terms with their glaring hypocrisy. But, let’s press on to the wider point at stake here. Rich capitalists in general, loudly espousing and sermonizing on the good that capitalism does, must come to terms with their even more glaring-er-ly hypocrisy. By investing their dollars and manufacturing their goods in China, they are helping to keep the world’s worst regime (in terms of suffering aggregates) alive and kicking.
Communism and socialism are fantastically expensive forms of government. One is reminded of the brilliant Simpsons episode in which Homer, Smithers, and Burns, armed with a trillion dollar bill, accidentally hand it over to Fidel Castro, who had just a minute earlier admitted “Comrades, our nation is completely bankrupt. We have no choice but to abandon Communism. I know I know I know, but we all knew from day one this mumbo-jumbo wouldn't fly”. It costs a lot of money to maintain an oppressive army and hold a—is it literal or metaphorical? Let’s go with both—gun to the population, along with all the other necessary nonsense like surveillance, oversight, bureaucracy, self-serving parades, and propaganda.
The Chinese people before the twentieth century weren’t known for their ability to adapt from the old ways. I suppose if I came from an ancient culture steeped in traditions like a teabag far past its potency, I’d have the same issue. But I’m from America. Changing our culture only takes a Kim Kardashian selfie in a possibly blue, possibly gold dress. But in the second half of the twentieth century, the ruling one-party system knew they’d run out of money fast, and how. So they adapted and adopted capitalist principles for their benefit, effectually fitting a square peg into a round, often temperamental and violent hole by seizing all the large moneymaking capitalist ventures pouring over there since NAFTA and wicked GM management, sick of the pesky UAW, drove jobs there.
A civilized and moral country with integrity would tell China that due to their multitude of human rights violations, condescending and superior airs they put on, and possibly the future world takeover (or at least destruction of the West) attitude many reasonable people infer from their actions, “we will no longer have trade and conversation with thee…ye…thou…thee-eth. Now begone, foul wretches!” That is, of course after an email with the exclamation symbol button pressed and mandatory read receipts (to denote its importance) is sent to all corporate leaders with stakes in Chinese soil to get out while the gettin’s good.
Do that, and I might have to leave one of my healthier children clutching a damp, sterile towel containing my left kidney on the doorstep of Apple to afford my next iPhone. And that’s fine. I can live without it. I think.
