Jeopardy has right and wrong answers. That kind of commitment to objective facts is just…gross.
The Taliban's leader is on Twitter and his feed is absolute FIRE
I’m about to declare a jihad on anyone who overuses “I’m about to declare a jihad on (insert annoying thing)” jokes, thereby trivializing the word.
Current generation showing there's wiggle room on TLC's "No Scrubs" rule
Not too Many and not too Few Scrubs. The Perfect Number of Scrubs.
Twitter mob cancels Taliban, makes them apologize for mean things
The Canceling be on thy and thy children’s heads. Thou hast been warned.
Liberal actor flabbergasted to discover republicans are actually human
“Their pants don’t wreak of their own dried and crusty fecal leavings.”
White guy suspended from job while other white people decide if he's racist
Was the offending party straight, white, and male? He might as well throw a pitchfork at himself.
Taliban fell statue of historic figure; irony completely lost on these ANTIFA bozos
You know that the men who fought in World War II were ANTIFA, right?
US Government on the lookout for its next costly geopolitical blunder
It’s the government’s money. Who are we to tell them what to do with it?
Pandemic 2: The Bidening is coming to theaters, restaurants, and life near you
When something is a hit, you need a sequel.
Hear me out-America hating athletes are good for America
Yes, they're part of what makes 'Merica great.
Resolved: the police are actually good for criminals
Were the police removed from the order-sustaining and restoration equation, things would get more than ugly.
The Patriarchy should put a stop to these mental health scams
We men just go out there and be men. If that’s mentally unhealthy, I don’t want to be the other thing.
Bezos building Amazon hub in space to evade even more taxation
I’m sure while he was up there he paid some cosmic entity to pelt him with gamma rays so he could acquire all of the Fantastic Four’s powers.
Help me teach pretty boys on Tiktok how to change a tire and do other manful tasks
Your barber is not a stylist. She’s a barber. You will address her as such. You will not make an appointment ahead of time, and you will not spend the whole haircut talking about yourself.
Unknown athlete from insignificant sport does what heroes do
Liberals really are smarter than the rest of us.
Critical Race Theory Monster used to scare conservative children into eating vegetables
I hate white people, Professor Fleen. On them, I am not too keen.
People with no jobs taking maternity leave to get away from doing nothing
OMGosh-diggity, it’s supes exhausting getting nothing done.
